Results 1 to 36 of 36

Thread: Gibsons? Yuck!

  1. #1
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Gibsons? Yuck!

    Gibsons are probably the ugliest and most awkward to play guitars ever made. The L5 looks like a sloppy lard ass without a muscle in its flab. The SG is atrocious with its owl ear horns, like it's some kind of tough demon. Even Link Wray was ashamed to play one, and if he had had more than one hit, he'd have bought a Woolworth's plywood special. And speaking of "specials" and "studios"--that's just Gibson's way of telling you that you can't afford the real thing. 335's are almost the worst. The body's are so wide they remind me of my ex-wife's barn-sized ass.

    But the worst is the Les Paul. Sure, they sound great and are wonderful to play. But just look at it with real guitars. I'd feel prouder if I had a guitar shaped mold of compressed vomit.

    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  2. #2
    Administrator
    Webmaster
    Ken Fortunato's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Posts
    1,332

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    The biggest problem, with all of those, is they're facing the wrong way...

    "...put aside the alienation, get on with the fascination, the real relation, the underlying theme."
    Neil Peart (September 12, 1952 - January 7, 2020)

  3. #3
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Quote Originally Posted by Ken Fortunato View Post
    The biggest problem, with all of those, is they're facing the wrong way...
    I agree. Their mothers took nasty medicines during gestation. Think of the Les Paul as putrid afterbirth.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  4. #4
    Forum Member phantomman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Ten miles from the Mexican Frontier, in Arizona
    Posts
    5,667

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    BLOW ME!
    "When injustice becomes law then rebellion becomes duty."

  5. #5
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Quote Originally Posted by phantomman View Post
    BLOW ME!
    Hahaha.

    Rog, don't you want to share your pics of those toothpick quality things Gibson calls guitars?

    I've bet you've got some that would make me drool but not because they really ARE great and I love them but because I'm getting old and just drool.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  6. #6
    Forum Member gibsonjunkie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Bloomfield, CT
    Posts
    6,081

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Originally I wanted my screen name to be GibsonJunk - but it was already taken.
    "We catched fish and talked, and we took a swim now and then to keep off sleepiness." Mark Twain

  7. #7
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    GibsonJunk would have been the perfect name, but "junky" is good enough cos it shows you're addicted to "junk". Good you can admit it. I appreciate what you've done for the guitar world, corralling a bunch of those ugly pieces of junk to keep them out of circulation. Good man, you should buy another every time you see one, keep the world safe from them. We appreciate your service and your sacrifice. Thoughts and Wares.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  8. #8
    Forum Member OldStrummer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Location
    Northern Virginia, USA
    Posts
    1,844

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Holy screed! I can't imagine how this brick came into my possession. It even looks like brick. Friggin' G-Force tuning, coil-splitting, metal knobs with abalone inlays, Burst Bucker PAF pickups. What a freak! Eww.


  9. #9
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Fred, the bathroom counter called and wants its top back. I wouldn't be surprised to see toothpaste spittle and tiny bits of spinach stuck to that top. Do you clean it with Lysol tub and tile? Clean it with a scrub brush and a sponge? Find yourself shaving over it? Did you get it at a building supply store in the plumbing section? Did Lowe's have someone to install it for you?
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  10. #10
    Forum Member OldStrummer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Location
    Northern Virginia, USA
    Posts
    1,844

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Have you ever had a tick stuck on you? You know, those nasty little disease-carrying insects that are almost impossible to remove? Well, that's this Gibson. It attached itself to me over 40 years ago and I haven't been able to shake it loose. Dang nasty critter!


  11. #11
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    If you look at syphilis under a microscope, you'll see that exact shape, size, and color.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  12. #12
    Forum Member Laker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    On da lakeshore in Wisconsinski
    Posts
    921

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    The first time I saw my ‘59 ES-345 was in 1964 when my friend traded it for a new cherry red 345. I jonesed for this guitar for 25 years until I finally had the opportunity to buy it in 1990.


  13. #13
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Quote Originally Posted by Laker View Post
    The first time I saw my ‘59 ES-345 was in 1964 when my friend traded it for a new cherry red 345. I jonesed for this guitar for 25 years until I finally had the opportunity to buy it in 1990.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]
    You should have held out another 25 years, and you know what that means for us aging folks.

    Oh, it's really beautiful and probably sounds great, but I had a beautiful girlfriend who turned out to be a meth addict. I'm not saying your guitar is involved in anything illegal, but it looks like it would be if I had the chance.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  14. #14
    Forum Member OldStrummer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Location
    Northern Virginia, USA
    Posts
    1,844

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    A few years ago I sneezed, and out popped this booger, which took the shape of a 1998 Gibson LP Special. I've never been able to clean up the mess it made.


  15. #15
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    When I was 19, I worked the overnight shift at a convenience store (brrrr). Once in the heat of August, the manager had thrown away four full chickens that had gone bad. The dumpster people missed ours that week, and each day in that dutch oven under the Tennessee sun, those chickens smelled more and more foul. By the time the dumpster people came, it smelled so strongly of death that I gagged when i had to go outside.

    I hadn't felt that feelings until I saw your "Special" guitar. Best metaphor for that experience that I can think of.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  16. #16
    Forum Member dirtdog's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    The Deep North
    Posts
    1,934

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    I always thought the Les Paul was modelled after Gary McBurney’s swimming pool!

    That would explain the neck dive. Yar yar yar!

  17. #17
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Quote Originally Posted by dirtdog View Post
    I always thought the Les Paul was modelled after Gary McBurney’s swimming pool!

    That would explain the neck dive. Yar yar yar!
    Oops. Haha
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  18. #18
    Administrator
    Webmaster
    Ken Fortunato's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Posts
    1,332

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Headless conversions are easy on a Gibson... Just gig it...

    "...put aside the alienation, get on with the fascination, the real relation, the underlying theme."
    Neil Peart (September 12, 1952 - January 7, 2020)

  19. #19
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Ha ha. I live in fear of breaking the headstock on my Les Paul. My Hofner had suffered it and had been repaired. You can't even tell it, and it's so well repaired that I don't even think about it.

    I love Gibsons, and I think they're still putting out fantastic guitars. Maybe the "golden age" has passed, but my 2012 is so well constructed and is such a lovely instrument.

    I'm just pissed at Gibson that they haven't made any new lefties in 2 years. I'm GASsing bad for a 63 reissue 335, block inlays, cherry finish (I'd take any other color, but I just don't want a sunburst 335).
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  20. #20
    Forum Member OldStrummer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Location
    Northern Virginia, USA
    Posts
    1,844

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Not a lefty, not a sunburst, and not cherry, but just as bad. Memphis hated it so bad it threw it out.


  21. #21
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    i want to take it and love it hard. It looks like a slut.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  22. #22
    Forum Member OldStrummer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Location
    Northern Virginia, USA
    Posts
    1,844

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Doesn't "SG" stand for "Sucky Guitar?" This is one of the suckiest. Its twin, the black sheep of the pair, won't even step into the light.



  23. #23
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Quote Originally Posted by OldStrummer View Post
    Doesn't "SG" stand for "Sucky Guitar?" This is one of the suckiest. Its twin, the black sheep of the pair, won't even step into the light.


    Kindling
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  24. #24
    Forum Member OldStrummer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Location
    Northern Virginia, USA
    Posts
    1,844

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Dang! They must be like gremlins; you don't see or hear from them, but just mention their name...

    Finally out of the closet, shamelessly hawking its Steinberger™ gearless tuners and its "zebra coil" '57 Classic humbuckers. Pee yew!



  25. #25
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    I....I....I can't do it anymore. I'm so overwhelmed by the beauty of all the Gibsons on this thread, that my heart is bursting into song,

    "I love Gibsons, yes I do. I was only kidding, they're not really poo...."
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  26. #26
    Forum Member gibsonjunkie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Bloomfield, CT
    Posts
    6,081

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Quote Originally Posted by ch willie View Post
    I....I....I can't do it anymore. I'm so overwhelmed by the beauty of all the Gibsons on this thread, that my heart is bursting into song,

    "I love Gibsons, yes I do. I was only kidding, they're not really poo...."
    My new theme song!!!

    You want phtots? Here we are in order of acquisition...

    1971 J-40 (phtot taken around 1974)



    2014 Les Paul Special AAA Flame Top with F-Hole, 2001 Gary Moore Les Paul. 2011 Les Paul Traditional Pro Goldtop, 2003 Les Paul Faded Double Cutaway




    2001 ES 335



    2001 Hummingbird



    2003 J-200



    2016 HP 665 SB (bought off the Gibson Bus - I'm pretty sure it was a prototype) They shipped me the pickguard and case after the fact).


    Aren't they hideous???
    "We catched fish and talked, and we took a swim now and then to keep off sleepiness." Mark Twain

  27. #27
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Too much greatness for one man to own.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  28. #28
    Forum Member Offshore Angler's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    New York Finger Lakes Area
    Posts
    7,465

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Well, some people buy guitars based upon how they look. Others purchase them based upon how they play and sound.

    Sure a Tele is like a Top Fuel dragster, but a Les Paul is Formula 1.

    I love the look and feel of a Les Paul. And the sound - well, NOTHING else sounds like a Les Paul. It's the Iconic Sound of Power and Southern Rock.


    Chuck
    "No harmonic knowledge, no sense of time, a ghastly tone, unskilled vibrato, and so on. Chuck is one of the worst guitar players I know" -Gravity Jim

  29. #29
    Administrator
    Webmaster
    Ken Fortunato's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Posts
    1,332

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!






    "...put aside the alienation, get on with the fascination, the real relation, the underlying theme."
    Neil Peart (September 12, 1952 - January 7, 2020)

  30. #30
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Quote Originally Posted by Offshore Angler View Post
    Well, some people buy guitars based upon how they look. Others purchase them based upon how they play and sound.

    Sure a Tele is like a Top Fuel dragster, but a Les Paul is Formula 1.

    I love the look and feel of a Les Paul. And the sound - well, NOTHING else sounds like a Les Paul. It's the Iconic Sound of Power and Southern Rock.


    Chuck
    I think of my Tele as a blue jeans and t-shirt guitar. I think of the Les Paul as a wicked suit and tie guitar, an uptown Sat'd'y night guitar.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  31. #31
    Forum Member OldStrummer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Location
    Northern Virginia, USA
    Posts
    1,844

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    You guys are much too kind. I'm on a Fender site because given a choice, I'd pick a Fender over a Gibson. Any day.

    (Fortunately, I don't have to make that choice, so I own both!).

  32. #32
    Administrator
    Webmaster
    Ken Fortunato's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Posts
    1,332

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    These "lag-bolt, canoe paddles" ain't much better... However, you can certainly use them as self defense weapons, if the need arises...


    "...put aside the alienation, get on with the fascination, the real relation, the underlying theme."
    Neil Peart (September 12, 1952 - January 7, 2020)

  33. #33
    Administrator
    Webmaster
    Ken Fortunato's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Posts
    1,332

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Both brands of complete junk together...

    This one should send the PRS and Suhr guys over the edge...



    "...put aside the alienation, get on with the fascination, the real relation, the underlying theme."
    Neil Peart (September 12, 1952 - January 7, 2020)

  34. #34
    Forum Member ch willie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    6,170

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Thanks, Ken. I've got to go in for a lobotomy now.
    Guitar freaks of the world unite!

  35. #35
    Administrator
    Webmaster
    Ken Fortunato's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Posts
    1,332

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Quote Originally Posted by ch willie View Post
    Thanks, Ken. I've got to go in for a lobotomy now.

    "...put aside the alienation, get on with the fascination, the real relation, the underlying theme."
    Neil Peart (September 12, 1952 - January 7, 2020)

  36. #36
    Forum Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2015
    Location
    At the start.
    Posts
    767

    Re: Gibsons? Yuck!

    Aboot a tenth of them I have. I usually stack them NEXT to the fireplace in cordwood fashion to make 'em easier to burn on a cold night.


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •