Really sucking, and still having a good show. How...

How is this possible? This is a serious question on how this happens....

Last night I played out with my band. We have not practiced in about two weeks, but have played out three times since.

You can see where this is going, right?

We opened up for a popular cover band in CT, and only had about 30 people who were there from our camp. The place went nuts for us; the bar owner loved us, gave us a bonus and re-booked us; the other band asked us to play with them at Toad's; a bunch of sign-ups on the email list....


......but we sucked!?!


How can it be? It was a bad show and I have a video to prove it. None of the 'Your standards are too high for yourself' or 'You are your hardest critic' crap applies here. We were too loud and too fast. I hit about 10 bad notes (on slide) I played the wrong chord three times, the singer was flat, my tone was horrendous, etc....

I know this is how many musicians feel after shows, they focus on the bad, but this was autrocious. Even worse, the video camera used to tape it seems to have a tracking problem and it is almost unwatchable because of the "tape dragging" effect that modulates the pitch of music. I need to get an audio copy of the show and give it a listen.

Maybe I am splitting hairs. I guess you can say that many people do not discern microtonal differences that, to me, sound out of key to me. Maybe they were all drunk, it was a bar you know! :tw59

I guess we had fun and that is a huge part of what comes across. If I get a copy of the audio, I'll post an example of the "suckage" fest...

If I had a dollar for every time I walked off after the last song and had a shot because I was so angry at either myself or the band in general that I was about to hit something, I'd have all my debt paid off and I'd own my lovely Airstream retirement estate.

Even at TFF jam, some drunk in the bar screamed "do you know how good you are" and I was thinking "man, you oughta hear my friends in Nashville."

It's funny, I was talking with a band member just last night, about my numerous failings both musical and personal and he said "you hold your own, man."

He was lying. I suck and I know it. The ONLY thing I have going is that I do what I do and I don't try to be anyone but myself. Don't try to sound like anyone else and even though I steal licks from my friends (Rob McNelly is the latest victim of my larceny), I sure dont steal their BEST stuff because when I hear THAT, I want to set my gear on fire.

Oh well. I plug on and do my best. But I sure as shit don't have any illusions about how good I am. I ain't.

Most people are non-musicians. They largely can't tell if you screwed up unless it was pretty much a train wreck or the tuning was so bad that it was obvious. But they sure can tell if you're putting forth good energy and a good attitude. That's what they see. And if the songs are reasonably well done (I've heard you play tbb - even when you 'suck' you're still very, very good) that's all they want. Song selection is key too.

And if there were any musicians in the audience - most are too polite to be critical of another band. If they are rude enough to get in your face - just ask them, "If you're so good, why are you hear listening to us? How come you're not gigging?" Shuts 'em down REAL fast.

:D

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Originally posted by thebluesbarn
'Your standards are too high for yourself' or 'You are your hardest critic' (does not apply) here. We were too loud and too fast. I hit about 10 bad notes (on slide) I played the wrong chord three times, the singer was flat, my tone was horrendous, etc....

I guess we had fun and that is a huge part of what comes across.

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Asked and answered. The stuff you mention does apply.

Too loud: Unless you were ear-bleeding loud, no one noticed.

Too fast: Most bands are, especially with covers when the energy is high. Unless they were comparing it to the original as you played, they wouldn't have a clue. Mostly because their energy is up too, live show, friends, booze.

Wrong Notes: So, who hasn't? I've had shows where I was the wrong note king. Everyone said I kicked ass. Go figure.

Singer was flat: Same rules apply, unless it's agregious, in which case someone would've said something.

Wrong chord: Close to wrong notes, tell them it was Jazz!

Tone was horrendous: We all (guitarists) place too much emphasis on this. True, the more we like our sound the more confident we are, the better we play. The average audience member couldn't care less.

Had fun: Bingo, so did they. Do better next time, but for now bask in the glow, you probably deserve it more than you think.

All very good points from everyone.

I'll try to sum this is up in a few simple words.

You've been doing these songs for a while now and you're listening for different things than you used to. It happens to everyone. Just try to think back when the material was fresh and exciting to all of you. You'll hear it and perform it differently. I'm sure you guys were fine.

One of the benefits of doing originals is you're the only one to know just how bad you screw up....

Yep, to all of the above.

"The singer ain't singin' and the drummer's been draggin too long...so pick up the temp just a little and take it on home."

She said listening to the fledgling drummer doink-bonkin' in 5/19 next door. I said, son, I said, SON! Ya gotsta take some lessons er sumpin'. Try a , one of them new fangled metranomeeee, thingamajigs. I said, Get a metranome, son!

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Originally posted by Annie D.
Yep, to all of the above.

"The singer ain't singin' and the drummer's been draggin too long...so pick up the temp just a little and take it on home."

She said listening to the fledgling drummer doink-bonkin' in 5/19 next door. I said, son, I said, SON! Ya gotsta take some lessons er sumpin'. Try a , one of them new fangled metranomeeee, thingamajigs. I said, Get a metranome, son!

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When you said doink-bonkin, I thought you were talkin bout sumthin else. My bad.

don't be so hard on yourself. as long as you were havin fun, then that is all that matters. isn't that why we play music? chalk up all the wrongs and bad things to experience, and try not to repeat them. but don't think about it too much.

hell, i got up and played two songs last night, on borrowed gear, with an unrehearsed drummer. it was a blast though. it is all in good fun man, music is my life, and i try to make music and my life fun. don't sweat it, just rock the joint next time! not that you didn't, but i think you get what i'm saying.

chuck'o c, my whole musical existence consists of gettin' up there on borrowed gear with unknown players and lettin' it fly. It was real cool for the first two years, but man I'm tired of it now and can't wait to be making those musical expressions within the parameters of a tight, focused band. I hope I can still do it! My instincts have changed alot. Time to change again.

Thanks guys, I guess you had to be there. It blew.

"......within the parameters of a tight, focused band".

Without a doubt, the most fun improv happens when we are tight and rehearsed and as Tele-Bob points out, focused. The most creative and expressive soloing, for me, comes from when I am very comfortable (rehearsed) with the band and the song.

I do enjoy total improv/pick-up type jams, but not usually in front of crowds because I too insecure. I'm not too insecure about my playing, I'm insecure about my big fat ass trying to shake it up on stage. I lack stage presence and it's mostly because of insecurity.

LOL! If you lack stage presence, then just do the "brooding" thing. You know, the deep, tortured artist who keeps his head down and reflects on the world with every note. Chicks dig it. Then again, don 't listen to me. I have never been approached by a babe who liked my stage thing. It's been a huge void in my life actually. That's it. Now I'm depressed. I'm going to start brooding.

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Originally posted by Tele-Bob
LOL! If you lack stage presence, then just do the "brooding" thing. You know, the deep, tortured artist who keeps his head down and reflects on the world with every note. Chicks dig it. Then again, don 't listen to me. I have never been approached by a babe who liked my stage thing. It's been a huge void in my life actually. That's it. Now I'm depressed. I'm going to start brooding.

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d00d, you saw me. I have the stage presence of a banana slug. Why do you think I need someone else to front the band?

I've never been approached by a babe either. Coupla skanks I turned down cold but NEVER a babe.

Serious is good, but TOO serious is bad....
Laid back is better than laid-out....
'Tis better to have fun....
Enjoy the short-lived glory of fame....

Pete: U-Baaaaaaaddddddddddddddd. And I mean that in a good way

The flip side of this scenario, of course, is to just shine like the north star and the audience sits there like bumps on the proverbial log.

Give it all. Hit every note. Play like you're possessed and hit a seven-league stride and nobody notices. Did this in Canada at a huge thing. We were NOT known up there and they didn't give a rat's ass if we struck gold or not. (picture the Home Alone face-slap here X ):rolleyes:

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Originally posted by Annie D.
Pete: U-Baaaaaaaddddddddddddddd. And I mean that in a good way

The flip side of this scenario, of course, is to just shine like the north star and the audience sits there like bumps on the proverbial log.

Give it all. Hit every note. Play like you're possessed and hit a seven-league stride and nobody notices. Did this in Canada at a huge thing. We were NOT known up there and they didn't give a rat's ass if we struck gold or not. (picture the Home Alone face-slap here X ):rolleyes:

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Annie, you're a sweetie. Ain't we all our own worst critics?

You have to sing backup on our record we have planned for later this year.

We leave for the cruise on Jan 7.

Harmony's my middle name, Sugar. I have good range and can multi-track all the parts

You have Janet give Delbert a big ol' juicy *smooch* for me, 'kay?
And enjoy.

I tried to book but I wanted to go alone and it woulda been too darned spendy. Maybe next year. (There may be a bosomy platinum blond woman older than even me there again this year...she's a Chicoan and hangs at the Blues jams)

"I'm a serious musician, schooled in voice and composition...":tw59

A strange thing has been happening with my band. Up until a month or so ago, gigs were a little hit or miss as to whether we would get to that next level. Then, it changed. We started to kill at every gig...and it didn't have too much to do with how well we played. We are finally collectively able to deliver the whole narrative of a song with the right emotional intensity in each part, and hammer the audience with it. We don't worry about the audience getting into us...we reach out and grab them by the throat. Nobody talks through our set anymore....we have their full attention....and we don't even have a singer.
IMHO you don't give the audience the option of having a bad time......this is much more important that worrying about a flub here and there...

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Originally posted by peter r
We started to kill at every gig...and it didn't have too much to do with how well we played. We are finally collectively able to deliver the whole narrative of a song with the right emotional intensity in each part, and hammer the audience with it. We don't worry about the audience getting into us...we reach out and grab them by the throat.

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Well put Peter!
Our last three shows since this original post have been a lot better. I mean A LOT better. A big part of my (our)problem is that I always compare my playing to guitar greats, picking apart evey performance and obsessing over the mistakes. I used to worry about mistakes before they even happened. And then a couple of weeks ago I realized that most people at shows are not like that at all. They may in fact compare me to a famous guitarist, but they are not saying "He sucks in comparison to...". That's what I am saying to myself.

Then I thought about it and realized that I was being too hard on myself and missing out on all of the fun.

TBB:

Yeah, it's alot more rewarding and fun to play when you get that "comparison" monkey off your back. I've been there myself.

At some point not too long ago I finally discovered who I was on the guitar, and I don't really give a damn about sounding like or being compared to anyone else. I can only sound like me... It's liberating.
If I were to see your band, I would want to hear what you are about musically, not you trying to imitate someone else. And hey, when the playing is soulful, who cares if not all the notes are "right". The soul is the important thing, right ?

I just realized couple days ago (my wife pointed it out) that I have been so obsessed with what everyone else in the band was doing that I screwing up my part all the time. I'm taking this thread to heart. Time to get back to having fun playing and quit worrying about being perfect.